Rant

I just heard something today and it was traumatic. I could not help myself but my blood was boiling from bottom to top. I could feel my head burning and pressured from inside. So nauseated that I felt so many angry words choking in my throat. My lips were praising, but my heart was covered with bitter frustration. My ears were hearing the Words, but my head was filled with questions, "is it worth it?" I just cannot say it for I am so ashamed to even talk about it. I fell like I got stabbed from behind. I fell like I am like a filthy trash. I not even worth it to breath anymore.

My fake smiles. My fake goofiness. My fake happiness.

How can I see them the same way I used to see? How can I treat them the same way I used to do? It's disgusting. It smells like rotten flesh.